You will be amazed at how things magically fall into place when you let go the illusion of control.-Maryam Hasnaa
This has been my favorite life quote for some time. It’s spectacular and accurate AF. What I’ve learned over my life is: I can’t control anything other than myself, my actions and my thoughts. Any control outside myself is simply an illusion. That includes: outcome, how others perceive me and others actions. An example that comes to mind was my desire to be liked by everyone. I had a fear of not being liked so in return, I was always hesitant to let my true personality shine.
But life doesn’t work like that: The reality is that I can’t control others’ perceptions. All I can control is working to be my most authentic, genuine and kind self. Then let the chips fall where they may, there will be people who like me, people who dislike me and people who feel indifferent to me and that’s that. And like clockwork, everything falls into place. The people that are meant to be in my life stay and the ones that aren’t slowly fade out. Whatever’s going to happen is going to happen and I may as well be ready to battle when it happens.
How does this apply on the golf course? This can be seen in every aspect actually, every shot, and every round.
How golfers try to control a tee shot: Golfers usually tend to try to control the outcome of the shot, hitting the middle of the fairway, not going in the trees, etc. The reality is we can’t control where the ball ends up! There are external factors, wind, a fluke swing, an undesired bounce, etc. What we can control though, is our pre-shot routine, our tempo and our emotions. My rule in golf is to go through my pre-shot routine, take one last look at the target and mentally say “f*** it”. Bye bye ball! Whatever happens happens, and you’ll be surprised, like I was, how many more good shots you hit.
How golfers try to control in a golf round: Golfers usually tend to control the outcome of the round, such as breaking 80 or shooting their personal best score. That rarely works out… All you can focus on is putting in the necessary range work, mental work & putt in your best effort for the shot in front of you. And when it’s time for your game to [break 80 or shoot your personal best], it will happen.
My game in life and golf drastically improved when I simply just let go. Let go of needing to stay in control. Because here’s the thing, its extremely exhausting. And here’s the second thing, control doesn’t even exist, it’s an illusion.