Your body hears everything that your mind says.-Noami Judd
If your caddy talked to you the way you talked to yourself, would you fire them?
Ask yourself this question. Pick one of the following answers below:
- Give them a hefty tip and ask for their card for future referrals and rounds
- Give them the minimum required tip and forget their name immediately
- Fire them after the first hole
I’m going to guess that most of you are c) even though you may never admit it. Don’t worry, I’ll keep your little secret.
This is good news and bad news, depending on if you have your ‘cep specs on or not, you are not alone, 99% of people are like that, including myself. I’ve worked so hard on being kind to myself and I still fall short sometimes.
This is a bit long so bear with me on this scenario:
You’ve had a boys golf trip planned for so long. You put in your PTO months because its your dream golf trip, the Saint Andrews Marathon!
It’s going to be absolutely amazing, to experience where golf was born. You can’t wait to feel the cool breeze on your face, experience the awful pot bunkers and observe the dreaded fescue in person. In the back of your mind, you are a bit uneasy because you haven’t played for a while and all your buddies are single handicapped, but whatever, it’s going to be a great memorable trip.
You count down the days until you arrive at the Old Course St Andrews. There, you find out that each individual is paired with the same caddy for the remainder of the trip.
You meet your caddy, Bart. Immediately you have a sinking feeling because you dislike him before he opens his mouth. His mouth was a permanent upside down smile and his eyebrows made him look extremely unapproachable.
While the other caddies politely introduced themselves to their players, Bart gives you the up-down look and says “You look like the worst player in the group. I don’t think you’ll be able to keep up.”
Your jaw drops and you’re completely speechless…
“Who does this old man think he is? He’s my caddy for god sake.” You think. But you put on a joking smile because you’re stuck with him for the next 7 rounds and say, “Hey, looks are deceiving, my friend.”
You all make way to the 1st tee where the starter gives the okay to play away. There’s a practice green behind the first tee with a few players putting.
Your buddy tees off first and rips a drive 285 yd in the middle of the fairway. It’s your turn next.
Bart shows you the line and steps back. As you’re begin your pre-shot routine, he begins to talk.
“Remember how I told you earlier that I thought you wouldn’t be able to keep up with the rest of the players? Well, your friend just hit that great drive and if you don’t hit a decent drive right now, the starter, the rest of the group and the spectators on the putting green are going to completely agree with me. Anyways, go on.”
Wow, what a prick. You try to ignore this old senile man, and proceed to hit the shot.
You 20 yd duck hook it into the water on the left, the worst shot you’ve hit to date.
You hear Bart chuckle in the background.
“What did I tell you? You’re pathetic. And now all these people know it as well.”
The rest of the group tee off and you begrudgingly walk along side with Bart to the drop zone. Along the way, he is grumbling about how he hates the cold and having to walk this stupid course.
You drop your ball and prep for the next shot, which is a 200 yd shot with tail wind and a pot bunker short left and hazard behind the green. It is a tucked back pin and you already know that the miss is short right. Not the easiest shot but definitely not impossible.
You go through your pre-shot routine and Bart is completely quiet.
You think “Thank god he can keep his mouth shut sometimes.” But you spoke too soon.
Right before you hit the ball, he says, “There is no way you can pull off this shot. Are you kidding? You’re hitting a 3-iron. When have you ever hit that club well?”
Shocked, you flinch and pull the ball short left into the pot bunker.
“What is your problem?! Can’t you see I’m just trying to enjoy my round? I have been planning for this trip for months and you are ruining everything!” You turn around and yell at Bart.
He takes 3 large strides towards you, keeping his beady eyes locked with yours and slaps the club out of your hand. He puts both hands on your collar and pulls you in and whispers, “You listen to me, you little brat. You are not good enough to be here. You take too long in your pre-shot routine and you can’t even hit decent shots to back it up. You are holding back these players.”
He releases his hold on you and proceeds the next shot.
You’re completely flustered, reach down to straighten out your shirt and immediately start to doubt yourself. Was he right? Was I slowing down my group? Am I ruining the experience for everyone?
You quicken your pace to your ball and the rest of the players. Bart is waiting at the pot bunker, “Hurry up. Everyone is waiting for you. Hurry and hit a good shot so we can be done with this hole.”
You don’t even go through your pre-shot routine and hack the ball out of the bunker. It hits the lip and ends up 3 feet from the hole.
You go to putt out, and Bart says, “Even tour players only make 80% of those putts. What makes you think you’re going to make it?”
You try your best to ignore him and make the putt for par. What a hole it’s been. You realize that you have no idea how your playing partners played.
What if I told you that you had to take Bart with you everywhere for the rest of your life?
Writing these visual gave me goosebumps and it has really inspired me to start being my own caddy. If I wouldn’t tolerate this from anyone else, why would you tolerate it from the most important person to you? As a reminder to myself, I have set this photo as my new phone wall paper. I encourage you to do the same. Email me a screenshot if you decide to do it, I’d love to see it 🙂
PS I just started my Youtube Channel and I did a video on this topic so here’s the link in case you’re interested